WASHINGTON, D.C. — As debate raged over the Trump administration granting refugee status to a group of South African farmers fleeing threats to their lives in their home nation, congressional Democrats proposed building a wall to keep white immigrants out of the country.
Babylon Bee
Eyeing 2028 Presidential Bid, Gavin Newsom Distances Self From Gavin Newsom
SACRAMENTO, CA — The next race for the White House already showed signs of being in full swing, as, eyeing a potential 2028 presidential bid, California Governor Gavin Newsom took steps to distance himself from California Governor Gavin Newsom.
Furious Democrats Demand To Know Who Was Responsible For Covering Up Biden’s Decline
WASHINGTON, D.C. — Democrats in Congress have angrily demanded answers as to who repeatedly lied to the American people in order to cover up former President Biden’s cognitive decline.
10 Shocking Signs Of Biden’s Decline Everyone Missed
Jake Tapper dropped an absolute bombshell this week, reporting that despite all evidence to the contrary, former President Joe Biden actually suffered severe physical and mental decline during his presidency. How did we all miss this? Looking back in hindsight, here are ten shocking signs we can’t believe…
South Africa Denounces White Refugees For Leaving Before They Had A Chance To Take All Their Stuff And Kill Them
CAPE TOWN — While controversy over displaced farmers swirled in the United States, officials in South Africa denounced white refugees for leaving before they had a chance to take all their stuff and kill them.
LDS Theologians Confirm Apostates Will Be Sent To Outer Darkness Where There Is Only Weeping And Imagine Dragons
SALT LAKE CITY — A letter issued by the First Presidency of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints has clarified what lay members have long suspected: that upon death, apostates will be sent to outer darkness where there is only weeping and the sound of Imagine…
Pete Rose Hall Of Fame Induction Ceremony To Be Sponsored By DraftKings
COOPERSTOWN, NY — Despite not yet being officially elected to the prestigious and exclusive group, one late baseball player already landed a lucrative sponsorship, as it was announced that Pete Rose’s Hall of Fame induction ceremony would be brought to you by DraftKings.
Couple Declines To Attend Chinese Underground Church Over Lack Of Children’s Programming
XUANHUA — One local family’s search for a new place of worship continued last weekend, as a couple declined to attend a Chinese underground church over its lack of children’s programming.
DNC To Remove David Hogg After Realizing He’s David Hogg
U.S. — The Democratic National Committee has begun the process to oust David Hogg from its leadership after realizing that he is David Hogg.
Here Are 8 Other Gifts World Leaders Are Giving To America
While the Qatrai government’s giving President Donald Trump a luxurious, state-of-the-art jet has grabbed headlines, it’s actually quite common for foreign governments to send things as special gifts to build relations and curry favor.