WASHINGTON, D.C. — Congresswoman Ilhan Omar reportedly held a lengthy phone call with former President Barack Obama on Tuesday, during which she inquired whether or not he still had the number for that birth certificate guy.
Babylon Bee
After Scheduling Conflict, WNBA Finals Relocated To Church Fellowship Hall
ATLANTA, GA — Due to yet another scheduling conflict, Game 6 of the WNBA Finals has been relocated to a local church fellowship hall.
PSA: Reese’s Pumpkins Have Been Discovered To Contain Dangerous Poison So Please Give Them All To Dad For Safekeeping
EMERGENCY ALERT:
James Talarico Is The Babylon Bee’s Straight Man Of The Year
Texas Senatorial candidate James Talarico has been named The Babylon Bee’s Straight Man of the Year.
Siblings Take A Break From Fighting To Fight Some More
SALT LAKE CITY, UT — Brothers James and Timothy Gardner took a short break this afternoon from fighting to fight even more.
Brawl Erupts Between Non-Denominational Church And Spirit Halloween Over Vacant Storefront
IRVINE, CA — A violent brawl erupted between a non-denominational church and Spirit Halloween over a vacant commercial building that suddenly became available for rent.
Newsom Touts California As The Only State Where You Can See A Homeless Man Defecating On A Beach And On A Mountain In The Same Day
SACRAMENTO, CA — Ahead of the midterms, Governor Gavin Newsom once again touted California as the only state where you can see a homeless man defecating on a beach and on a mountain in the same day.
Riots Fizzle Out As French Refuse To Protest More Than 32 Hours Per Week
PARIS — Fiery riots across the country ended suddenly on Saturday when participants refused to protest more than 32 hours in a given week.
Experts Says Midterm Polls Only Bad For Republicans If You Look At Them
WASHINGTON, D.C. — Republican strategists reassured voters this week that polls for the upcoming midterm elections only appear bad for the GOP if you look at them.
VidAngel Announces ‘The Goshfather’
LEHI, UT — Content-filtering streaming service VidAngel announced a new, cleaner edit of The Godfather called The Goshfather.