WASHINGTON, D.C. — In an unprecedented move sure to take the legal world by storm, Justice Ketanji Brown Jackson issued a savage dissent in the form of a TikTok dance.
Babylon Bee
District Court Issues Nationwide Injunction Against Supreme Court Ruling
U.S. — In the wake of the United States Supreme Court ruling that will effectively prevent district courts from issuing nationwide injunctions, a district court issued a nationwide injunction against the Supreme Court ruling.
Pride Parade Followed Closely By Disinfectant Parade
SAN FRANCISCO — Pride Month festivities drew to a close Monday with one final Pride Parade that was closely followed by a Disinfectant Parade.
Gavin Newsom Sues Gavin Newsom For Ruining His Political Career
SACRAMENTO, CA — Sources close to Gavin Newsom say that the California governor is launching a lawsuit against Governor Gavin Newsom for ruining his political career.
Pastor Resigns In Disgrace After Failing To Use Greek Word In Sermon
MADISON, WI — Local pastor Nathan Enfield resigned in disgrace after he failed to use a single Greek word in his sermon this morning.
Jeff Bezos’s Wedding 100% Funded By Your Wife’s Amazon Purchases
TUSCON, AZ – Local man Jeremy Briggs sadly discovered this week that his wife’s Amazon purchases single-handedly funded billionaire Jeff Bezos’s elaborate Italian wedding.
Bad Sign? Trump Shoots Lightning from His Fingertips While Screaming ‘Unlimited Power!’ After Latest SCOTUS Ruling
WASHINGTON, D.C. – In what some are taking as perhaps a bad omen, President Trump responded to the SCOTUS ruling on nationwide injunctions by screaming "UNLIMITED POWER!" and shooting lightning from his fingertips.
Man Wakes Up Filled With Regret For Not Having More To Drink Last Night
EVANSVILLE, IN — Local man Mark English woke up this morning deeply regretting that he didn’t have more alcohol last night.
Mexican Restaurant’s Authenticity Questioned After Experiencing Zero ICE Raids
ATLANTA, GA — Locals have begun questioning the authenticity of purported Mexican restaurant "El Bandido" as ICE has yet to raid the restaurant a single time.
Nation Celebrates First Anniversary Of Biden Beating Medicare
U.S. — The United States officially celebrated the first anniversary of former President Joe Biden announcing that he had finally defeated Medicare once and for all.