CNN has been a mainstay of the American media since its inception in 1980. The prestigious network has won several awards covering everything from the 1993 World Trade Center bombing to 9/11, making it the most trusted name in news. Aspiring journalists, take note! CNN’s reporting on terrorist…
Babylon Bee
Nation Struggling To Contain Excitement At News Iran May Strike California
U.S. — Americans across the country struggled to rein in their excitement after news broke that Iran may strike the state of California.
Democrats Condemn Hegseth For Using Money To Feed Soldiers When It Could Have Gone To Somali Daycare
WASHINGTON, D.C. — Democrats criticized Secretary of War Pete Hegseth for giving frontline U.S. soldiers a nice meal when that money could have gone to fund Somali daycare centers in Minnesota.
Local Girl Warns Friends About Creep With BBQ Stain On White T-Shirt Ogling Her By Railroad Tracks
MONTGOMERY, AL — A local teenage girl warned her friends that there was a creep with a BBQ stain on his white t-shirt that persisted in ogling her as she tried to skip rocks on the river by the railroad tracks.
Parents Punish Teen By Forcing Him To Stay Up To Watch Jimmy Kimmel Monologue
FRANKLIN, TN — In what was later described as "unusually cruel", local parents punished their teen son by forcing him to stay up to watch Jimmy Kimmel’s monologue.
Tragedy: New Ayatollah Dead After Being Accidentally Left Out In Rain
TEHRAN — The newly-minted Supreme Leader Mojtaba Khamenei tragically died this morning after being accidentally left out in the rain.
Iran Asks Democrats For Tips On Running Country With Dead Leader
TEHRAN — Iranian government officials have reached out to the American Democratic Party for advice on how run a country with a dead leader.
Many Worried That The Giant Spiders Attacking New York Could Lead To An Increase In Hateful Arachnophobia
NEW YORK, NY — As giant mutant spiders attacked the Big Apple, many concerned experts across the country expressed worry that the giant attacking spiders could lead to a substantial increase in hateful arachnophobia.
9 Most Dangerous Places To Be A Christian
While many American Evangelicals often lose sight of it, the reality is that there are still places throughout the world where it is dangerous to live as a Christian. But where are the most dangerous places?
Toddler Review: ‘Peek-A-Boo’ Is An Unpredictable Mind Game That Shocks and Delights The Senses
Put away your Alphabet Blocks and get ready to live. Peek-a-Boo is an advanced game of trickery; an unpredictable mind game that shocks the mind and senses. Once you play it, nothing will be the same again.