ARVADA, CO — Local dad Craig Smith has spent the past year fervently praying that his daughter Claire will get a decent case of acne from age 14 until about 23.
Babylon Bee
Quiz: Tell Us How You Take Your Coffee And We’ll Tell You What Gender You Are
Damning Photos Surface Of Clippy On Epstein Island
U.S. — The new trove of Epstein documents has revealed damning photos of Microsoft’s former assistant "Clippy" visiting Epstein island.
Report: Zucchini Not Bad After Covering It With Flour And Seasoning And Frying Out All Of The Taste
U.S. — A new report out of Harvard University indicated that zucchini actually isn’t that bad after covering it with flour or cornmeal and a lot of seasoning and frying all the taste out of it in hot oil.
Experts Warn Arresting Journalists Could Be Slippery Slope To Arresting Politicians And Other People Who Deserve It
U.S. — Self-proclaimed journalist Don Lemon was arrested on Friday for allegedly raiding a church service and intimidating its congregation, prompting experts to warn that such actions taken by the DOJ could be a slippery slope that leads to arresting politicians and other people who deserve it.
Movie Studio With The Entire Collected Works Of Humanity To Select From Decides To Just Do ‘Spider-Man’ Again
LOS ANGELES, CA — A movie studio with access to the entire collected works of humanity for use in its film adaptations reportedly opted to make yet another Spider-Man movie instead, sources revealed.
Uh Oh: Trump Nominates Unknown Spanish Economist Ronaldo Paulino As Fed Chair
WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a surprise choice to succeed Jerome Powell when his term expired in the spring, President Donald Trump nominated an unknown Spanish economist named Ronaldo Paulino as chairman of the Federal Reserve.
Study Finds Everyone Else Is Doing A Great Job Parenting And You’re The Only One Having Problems With Your Kids
WASHINGTON, D.C. — A study from the National Academies of Sciences, Engineering, and Medicine (NASEM) confirmed on Friday that everyone is doing a great job parenting, and you’re the only one having problems with your kids.
Chilling: If They Can Arrest Don Lemon For Something As Simple As Breaking The Law, Imagine What They Can Do To You
America woke up this morning to the chilling news that journalist Don Lemon had been arrested by the Department of Justice, sending a terrifying message that if you break the law, you too might also be arrested and face the strong arm of totalitarianism.
12 Most Insidious Secret Jewish Plots Revealed
Everyone knows by now that the Jews are behind everything that happens in the world, but there are far more nefarious plots they are orchestrating that you don’t even know about.