FORT WORTH, TX — Bystanders at Andretti Karting reported that local dad Mark Hamilton was clearly just using his children as an excuse to ride go-karts.
Babylon Bee
10 Most Terrifying Things Inside One Of Those Dangerous Right-Wing Pregnancy Centers
You’ve all heard about them on the news. Pregnancy centers that reportedly contain and engage in only the most horrific and terrifying things. The things found within the corridors of these centers that seek to help young women through their pregnancies have remained a mystery… until now.
Children’s Bible Noticeably Vague On Rahab’s Backstory
GARY, IN — As Liam Miles cracked open a copy of The Beginner’s Bible to read to his son, he couldn’t help but notice that the text was noticeably vague on the backstory for Rahab the Harlot.
Man Waking Up From One-Year Coma Excited To See How Unified And Virtuous The Right Became In Wake Of Charlie Kirk’s Death
ROANOKE, VA — A man awoke from a year-long coma this morning, then eagerly checked his phone to see how unified and virtuous the American political right became in the wake of Charlie Kirk’s death.
Man Waking Up From Year-Long Coma Excited To See How Unified And Virtuous The Right Became In Wake Of Charlie Kirk’s Death
ROANOKE, VA — A man awoke from a year-long coma this morning, then eagerly checked his phone to see how unified and virtuous the American political right became in the wake of Charlie Kirk’s death.
Life Hack: Avoid Leaving Your Wallet At Home By Sitting It Next To Your Katana
Don’t you just hate it when you’re out buying Pokémon cards, only to discover that you left your wallet at home? Well, with an exciting new life hack, you’ll never forget your wallet again.
Life Hack: Avoid Leaving Your Wallet At Home By Setting It Next To Your Katana
Don’t you just hate it when you’re out buying Pokémon cards, only to discover that you left your wallet at home? Well, with an exciting new life hack, you’ll never forget your wallet again.
Mamdani Lays Wreath At Tomb Of The Unknown Hijacker
NEW YORK, NY — In a somber ceremony Friday morning, Mayor Zohram Mamdani laid a wreath at the Tomb of the Unknown Hijacker in remembrance of the 25th anniversary of 9/11.
Man Paying $5 A Gallon For Gas Sure Glad He Stuck It To Elon Musk By Getting Rid Of His Tesla
REDMOND, WA — According to sources, a local man who paid over $5 a gallon for gas was sure glad he stuck it to Elon Musk by getting rid of his Tesla.
White Women Argue Black Men Should Only Have Three-Fifths Of A Jury Vote
U.S. — As the aftermath of the Lindsay Clancy mistrial continued to reverberate across the country, one member of the jury confirmed that white women were now arguing that black men should only have three-fifths of a jury vote.