SORATA — The good news was revealed to be advancing like never before, as a church in the U.S. announced over the weekend that it had sent out a team of missionaries to a remote tribe that had never heard Switchfoot.
Babylon Bee
Jury Still Trying To Decide If Strangling Your Kids Is Okay
Chicago Mayor Touts Increased Diversity Of City’s Shooting Victims
CHICAGO, IL — In the wake of a mass shooting that left one dead and 14 wounded, Mayor Brandon Johnson touted the city’s increased diversity of shooting victims.
CNN Banned In New Mexico After New State Law Criminalizes Fake News
ALBUQUERQUE, NM — CNN has officially been forced off the air in New Mexico after the state passed a new law criminalizing fake news.
Child’s Honest Observations Becoming Pretty Hurtful
CLARENDON, TX — The honest, unfiltered observations offered up by local six-year-old Stephen Rawls have become progressively more hurtful for his parents to hear, sources revealed.
Mamdani Installs Muslim Foot-Washing Station At 9/11 Memorial
NEW YORK CITY, NY — Mayor Zohran Mamdani announced the installation of a Muslim foot-washing station at the base of the 9/11 Memorial in preparation for marking the 25th anniversary of the Islamic terrorist attacks.
Woman Who Has Nothing Bad To Say About Her Husband Uninvited From Ladies Lunch Group
PALO ALTO, CA — Local woman Brittany Robinson was kicked out of the local ladies lunch group after it became very apparent she had nothing bad to say about her husband.
Worm Girl Asks Worm Boyfriend If He’d Still Love Her If She Were A Human
BENTONVILLE, AR — Local girl worm Shelly caught her boyfriend Brad completely off guard when she asked if he would still love her if she was a human.
Tucker Carlson Spends 380th Consecutive Episode Criticizing Country Nobody Is Allowed To Criticize
U.S. — Former Fox News host turned podcaster Tucker Carlson released a groundbreaking 380th consecutive episode criticizing the one country that Carlson says no one is allowed to criticize.
Trump Names Harrison Ford As 2nd Greatest President In History
WASHINGTON, D.C. — Controversy swirled online on Friday, as President Donald Trump posted a graphic to social media ranking American leaders, with Harrison Ford listed prominently as the "2nd Greatest" president in history.