CHARLESTON, SC — After returning from the frontlines of the war in Iran, a local drone has found itself struggling to adapt back to a civilian life of delivering Amazon packages.
Babylon Bee
Who Won The War With Iran? 10 Different News Outlets Report
The U.S.-Iran War has captured hearts and headlines all over the world. Now, with a two-week ceasefire agreement in place, here’s how popular media outlets are reporting it:
Middle East Celebrates Ceasefire With Massive Fireworks Display
MIDDLE EAST — The nations of the Middle East celebrated the announcement of a ceasefire with an massive fireworks display that lit up the entire region.
Nike Releases New Tiger Woods Ad Campaign ‘Just Use Your Billion Dollars To Hire A Full-Time Driver’
U.S. — Sporting apparel giant Nike has released a new ad campaign alongside Tiger Woods, featuring the slightly updated slogan "Just Use Your Billion Dollars To Hire A Full-Time Driver".
Hell Confirms All Its Appliances Controlled With Apple TV Remote
NINTH CIRCLE OF HELL — Satan announced Wednesday that all its appliances going forward will be controlled by the Apple TV Remote.
Too Far? Trump Threatens To Nuke Used Car Dealership Unless It Comes Down Another $500 On 2017 Chevy Malibu
WASHINGTON, D.C. — The political world was set on edge once again on Wednesday, with experts urging everyone to prepare for the worst as President Donald Trump threatened to nuke a local used car dealership unless it agreed to come down another $500 on a 2017 Chevy Malibu.
World In Shock As Trump Takes Seemingly Extreme Position To Negotiate Best Possible Deal
WORLD — People across the globe were left in utter shock as President Trump staked out a seemingly extreme position in order to negotiate the best possible deal.
Psych! Trump Drops Bombs That Just Shoot Out Little Flags That Say ‘POW!’
TEHRAN — A cackling President Donald Trump completely psyched out the Iranian regime by threatening nuclear war and then dropping bombs that only shoot out little flags that say "POW!".
Newly Engaged Couple Sets Up Wedding Registry At Chevron Station
VAN NUYS, CA — Newly engaged couple Barrett Brown and Melissa McClaren excitedlywedding registry at a local Chevron station, sources close to the happy couple said.
The New Season Of ‘Californians Move To Texas’ Is Finally Here
Steve and Timpani moved from California to Texas in the hit series Californians Move To Texas. There were a few cultural differences they weren’t prepared for in going from California wokeness to Texas freedom. Now their story continues…