JERUSALEM — After definitively declaring that he would not believe in Jesus’ resurrection unless he saw and touched him, the Apostle Thomas was completely humiliated to learn that Jesus was right behind him the whole time.
Babylon Bee
Embarrassed Iranians Confess They Don’t Actually Know What ‘Ceasefire’ Means
ISLAMABAD — Amid ongoing reports that Iran had broken an expected two-week ceasefire by failing to sufficiently reopen the Strait of Hormuz, threatening to target vessels who who seek to travel the waters without first coordinating with their armed forces, and firing missiles at five different countries, Iranian…
Opinion: I Know I Was Wrong the First 1,347 Times, But Now Is the Time to Completely Freak Out About What Trump Said
This is it. President Trump has crossed a line with his latest statement. We can’t just talk — we need to take action!
Battle-Hardened Drone Returning From Iran War Struggling To Re-enter Life Of Delivering Amazon Orders
CHARLESTON, SC — After returning from the frontlines of the war in Iran, a local drone has found itself struggling to adapt back to a civilian life of delivering Amazon packages.
Who Won The War With Iran? 10 Different News Outlets Report
The U.S.-Iran War has captured hearts and headlines all over the world. Now, with a two-week ceasefire agreement in place, here’s how popular media outlets are reporting it:
Middle East Celebrates Ceasefire With Massive Fireworks Display
MIDDLE EAST — The nations of the Middle East celebrated the announcement of a ceasefire with an massive fireworks display that lit up the entire region.
Nike Releases New Tiger Woods Ad Campaign ‘Just Use Your Billion Dollars To Hire A Full-Time Driver’
U.S. — Sporting apparel giant Nike has released a new ad campaign alongside Tiger Woods, featuring the slightly updated slogan "Just Use Your Billion Dollars To Hire A Full-Time Driver".
Hell Confirms All Its Appliances Controlled With Apple TV Remote
NINTH CIRCLE OF HELL — Satan announced Wednesday that all its appliances going forward will be controlled by the Apple TV Remote.
Too Far? Trump Threatens To Nuke Used Car Dealership Unless It Comes Down Another $500 On 2017 Chevy Malibu
WASHINGTON, D.C. — The political world was set on edge once again on Wednesday, with experts urging everyone to prepare for the worst as President Donald Trump threatened to nuke a local used car dealership unless it agreed to come down another $500 on a 2017 Chevy Malibu.
World In Shock As Trump Takes Seemingly Extreme Position To Negotiate Best Possible Deal
WORLD — People across the globe were left in utter shock as President Trump staked out a seemingly extreme position in order to negotiate the best possible deal.