PARIS — Following Sunday’s theft of artifacts valued at $102 million, the Louvre updated its security system to include a second generation indoor Ring camera.
Babylon Bee
Trump Unveils White House Water Slide
WASHINGTON, D.C. — President Donald Trump announced this week that as part of the White House renovation, he will be installing a giant water slide on the roof that will go all the way down to the Rose Garden.
Trump Declares White House ‘ICE Free Zone’ Until Construction On New Ballroom Is Done
WASHINGTON, D.C. — President Trump has declared the White House a no-go zone for ICE raids until construction is completed on the new ballroom.
Man Replaces Personality With New Smoker
BOUNTIFUL, UT — Local man James Larson made a significant life change after deciding to replace his entire personality with his affection for his newly purchased smoker.
LeBron Performs Ceremonial Flop To Open New NBA Season
LOS ANGELES, CA — Lakers superstar LeBron James kicked off the NBA season Tuesday by performing the ceremonial opening flop ahead of the team’s first game against the Golden State Warriors.
Black Bears Demand To Be Referred To As ‘Bears Of Color’
SACRAMENTO, CA — In a historic move, California’s famous black bears, in cooperation with the NAACP, met on the steps of the state capitol to demand that they now be referred to as "Bears of Color."
Is It A Sin? Ask The Babylon Bee
People often mistake us for an official church ministry, so we get a lot of e-mails asking about sin. We usually ignore them, but not today! Join us as we exercise deep spiritual discernment to answer the following important questions:
White House Construction Crew Finds 1,357 More Cocaine Stashes
WASHINGTON, D.C. — Construction workers tasked with building a new White House Ballroom reportedly discovered 1,357 stashes of cocaine hidden within the walls and ceilings of the East Wing.
Trump Welcomes Top Australian Diplomat To White House
WASHINGTON, D.C.-In one of his most popular moves of all time, President Trump invited top Australian dignitary Bandit Healer to the White House.
Democrats Enjoy Their Favorite Pastime Of Holding All-White Rallies
WASHINGTON, D.C.-Democrats continued their long tradition of holding whites-only rallies over the weekend as hundreds gathered around the country to protest what they see as executive overreach.