WASHINGTON, D.C. — As President Trump continues brokering peace deals across the globe, Democrats warned that we are now further away from World War III than ever before.
Babylon Bee
Democrats Explain To Young Republicans They’re Supposed To Engrave Their Messages On Bullets Instead
U.S. — Democrats explained to the ignorant Young Republicans that hateful messages aren’t meant to be written in text messages, but engraved on bullets.
Wife Specifies To Husband Which Photo He’s Allowed To Share With ‘Dateline’ In The Event She’s Brutally Murdered
SALT LAKE CITY, UT — After putting a lot of thought into the potential scenario, a local wife specified to her husband which photo he’s allowed to share with Dateline in the event she’s brutally murdered.
Boomers Reveal Their Top 10 Tips For Getting Wealthy
In uncertain economic times, it can be helpful to look back at previous generations who achieved success and emulate what they did. Take Boomers, for example. They’re loaded.
Exhausted Government Employees Hoping To Go Back To Work Soon So They Can Get Some Rest
U.S. — According to sources, federal employees are eager for the government shutdown to end so they can go back to work and get some real rest.
Democrats Demand Trump Stop Fanning The Flames Of Peace
WASHINGTON, D.C. — Democrats have called on President Donald J. Trump to stand down and immediately stop fanning the flames of peace.
Sad Greta Thunberg Asks If Anyone Else Needs A Flotilla
STOCKHOLM — The ceasefire agreement between Israel and Hamas that was brokered by President Donald Trump had other unforeseen consequences, as sources reported hearing a sad Greta Thunberg ask if anyone else needed a flotilla.
Democrats Vow To Keep Government Shut Down Until Someone Notices
WASHINGTON, D.C. — As Americans across the country continued to carry on their day-to-day lives without any significant changes, Democrats vowed to keep the federal government shut down until someone notices.
9 Fun Ways To Celebrate Columbus Day
Back in 1492, Christopher Columbus sailed the ocean blue so that you could have an American holiday where everyone still has to work. Now it’s time to honor his achievement.
Asians Still Sticking With The Masks
WORLD — With COVID-19 no longer a public health emergency, people have largely abandoned their face masks and returned to pre-pandemic levels of caution with their health. That is, except for Asians, who appear to still be sticking with the masks.